is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
