THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
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I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.