I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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