im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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