She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
