We won't sleep together?
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
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