How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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