There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
tell your sister to shave her snatch
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Randomize
