I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize