I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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