never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
