Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
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