you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize