just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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