Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
she peed on how many people?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize
