Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
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