Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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