I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
