Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
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