My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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