Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize