Will you blow on my dice?
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
