just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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