do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
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