Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize