No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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