Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
