he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
