State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
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