mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Can i not drive my cunt home
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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