Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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