Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
