dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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