sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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