grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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