doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
