The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
