i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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