She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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