Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
