i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Randomize