he thought i was a dude.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
