so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
