I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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