I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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