the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
