What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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