Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
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