its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
