I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
