Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
